Wednesday, October 15, 2008

2nd Draft: Malaysians with Negative Attitudes

If you are a fan of Reader’s Digest, you may have come upon one of their articles about Kuala Lumper being the 3rd rudest cities in the world. Many Malaysians have reacted to this “accusation”, saying that the result was irrelevant. Well, for me, I would have to agree with what the Reader’s Digest had claimed. Malaysians are becoming ruder. Why did I say this? It’s because I have experienced it. This is what I have experience not long time ago.

It was finally the beginning of the school break and I was taking a bus back to my hometown. I entered the bus, took my ticket out and checked the seat number. However, the number doesn’t match so I had to wait for the bus driver to sort the problem. While waiting for the bus driver, a man climbed onto the bus. He had some problem walking. My assumption was the man probably just recovered from a stroke because he had problem to move half part of his body.

After a while, I got my seat and got comfortable. Suddenly, I heard some fuss at the front of the bus. There were two families arguing about bus seats. One of the families was pretty upset that their seats were taken by someone else. The family that sat in their seats was the sick man’s family. To not get confuse, I will name the first family A and the later B. One of the family A member and his relative protested saying that if he gave family B their seat than everyone would take advantage of them. They insisted that family B to give them their seats.

Then, I heard a female’s voice, “Can you see that he is sick and cannot move properly. Couldn’t you be tolerate?”. But family A refused to listen to their excuses. Suddenly the daughter (family A) butt in in the argument. She was quite young probably just finished her SPM. She said that they should follow the rule and sit in their original seat.
I feel pity for the sick man. He is sick and that’s not the way to treat a sick man. Just thinking of what he felt makes me sad. Luckily, a young lady and man gave their seats to the sick man and his wife (again my assumption) just in front of the seats that they sat.

For me, it was rude of that girl to butt in the argument since she was pretty young. Plus, talking like that is unacceptable since she was talking to someone older than her. My parents have raised me up to be someone who respects people who are older than you. Even if s/he is older a year than me. Not only was I taught to respect the elderly, I was also taught to respect everyone. If someone older than you did something unacceptable, you should address them in an orderly manner.

I wonder why Malaysians become rude. Is it because of the environment? Social lifestyle? In my opinion it is due to their upbringing. Children nowadays are not thought to respect their elders. Only some parents who really teach their children to respect others. Some parents are proud that they children could be outspoken. I think being outspoken is a good thing, but you have to know to whom you are talking to and the situation.

Other than that, they also think that they will not gain anything in return by being courteous. So why do we need to do it? People have become selfish these days. They only think about themselves and refuse to care for others.

I felt really disturbed by the girl’s behavior and that is why I agree that Malaysians are rude people. Some may say that it’s a one in a million cases and it does not really give the image of Malaysians.

11 comments:

  1. it seems you have change the title from true malaysians into Malaysian with negative atttitude.
    it think the second title is more appropriate for your draft. reading the title itself will tell the reader of what you are going to talk about..
    it is good to do so, as sometimes when the reader lack of time and just wanted to browse through the article the suitable and informative title will help them to select what to read.

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  2. A good essay with good flow of point, I like when you extended the point why Malaysians are becoming ruder. maybe you can give a comparison between the attitude of the malaysian society in the past and nowadays

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  4. Ahhh~ i really like this one. You improved a lot in your essay compare it with the previous one. I just wonder, which cities become the first and second rudest in the world. Opps.....is it in the world or in the Asian?Because from the previous essay you said the rudest cities in Asian. Just want the clarification.

    For your essay....good elaboration on each point. I can see there is flow in the content. Moreover, good organisation in your essay.

    For the last two paragraph, i think it is better if you can elaborate more on that point. I would love to know more about why Malaysian people become rude.

    for the third paragraph....maybe you should correct this sentence.

    "I got my seat and got comfortable"

    do you mean sit comfortably? maybe you should check this one.

    That's all. Thank you.

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  5. Hi all...
    I'd like to reques something for my 3rd draft. (If this is allowed...)
    I'm noy quite sure why are Malaysians behaving rude nowadays. Maybe because parents dont discipline their children anymore.
    That's only 1 point that i cn think of. can you help me with some new points that i can include in the 3rd draft? thank you!!

    To hanmie, 3rd rudest city in the world. Did a some internet research on that one. For the 1st and 2nd rudest city...hehehe, i couldn't answer that since the connection was really slow when i search for it.

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  6. ur draft is better now because you arraged it according to paragraph, easy for me to read, sorry ihavelots of typing error because my keyboard is problematic.then the tittle is related to your post but that is quite foarmal..but thats oaky.
    my point is the people nowadays are born with selfishness and materialisticism, that was nurtured by the development and current culture..haha. so far i can unerstand..

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  7. good title. your essay flow was good. seem like you do alot of reading and expirence it.
    good improvment. just to remind carefull to choose your title next time.

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  8. I think you have improved a bit in arranging your paragraphs. It has a nice flow. It's just that there are still a few grammatical errors especially between simple and present tense. For example, "I have experience" should be "I have experienced". Then, "He is sick" should be "He was sick". Maybe you should check again for others.

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  9. in my opinion, your 2nd draft was better than previous draft.

    it was good to elaborate more your topic, such as in paragraph 5 and 6. it will makes reader understand why you think that girl was rude. and also your thought about that matter.

    maybe in 3rd draft, you can imagine of you are a sick man's wife. just imagine... what will you say to the girl?

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  10. i wanna share my experience.. last two weeks when i wanted to return to maktab from perangin mall, in the yellow bus, an old chines man or should i call him apek was standing in front of the bus because he has no seat, besdie himwas an indian guy with his beg on the seat beside him. i was quite annoyed why the guy wouldnt offer him the seat. but then, a chinese lady from twoo seats behind stood up and insist the apek to take jher seat. but the a[pek refuse it, perhaps that previous guy felt guilty, then he offered the apex his 'bag' seat, i felt relief that the guy was not as selfish as i thought..well sometimes thy are not as bad as we thought, maybe they dont kmnow the polite way to offer and they feel ashamed or shy or whatever...this positive attitudes ofthe lady makes me proud to be malaysian..

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  11. "this is what i have experience" dont forget the have + ed there k :>, if u use past tense be careful of what u write. the rest of ur essay is good,but i wud like more if u add a better conclusion cos i feel like u want to write more. anyway im sure u can be a good writer :>

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